{"id":15492,"date":"2010-10-18T11:54:00","date_gmt":"2010-10-18T15:54:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/hame.ink\/hameblog\/2010\/10\/18\/wedded-to-an-idea\/"},"modified":"2025-09-12T07:50:16","modified_gmt":"2025-09-12T10:50:16","slug":"wedded-to-an-idea","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/hame.ink\/blether\/2010\/10\/18\/wedded-to-an-idea\/","title":{"rendered":"Wedded to an idea"},"content":{"rendered":"<p style=\"clear:both\">My darling is so patient: Tonight I experimented with a new recipe, a rice bowl with wasabi-dill dressing, snow peas, red pepper, avacado, chopped chives, and toasted pumpkin seeds.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"clear:both\">It sounds great. The reality was&#8230; <em>crunchy<\/em>. In a not-good way. <\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"clear:both\">He still said he liked it, and that&#8217;s why I love him.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"clear:both\">~<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"clear:both\">Late this afternoon, I sat down to work on the wedding, outlining the different sections that are traditionally included in the ceremony. I got a thumbnail sketch put together, but there was something else going on that I felt I had to get to the bottom of before I went any further.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"clear:both\">My heart felt a bit like it was going to explode.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"clear:both\">After asking myself some questions, it turned out I was someplace I recognise from my writing &#8212; that place where you&#8217;re overly concerned with product, with &#8220;What will the neighbours think?&#8221;, and disconnected from the creation itself.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"clear:both\">I probed a bit further, past the worry and the pressure &#8212; which of course weren&#8217;t doing anything to get the thing planned properly, but just made me fear and avoid it.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"clear:both\">On the other side of that I got a glimpse of what the character of this relationship is &#8212; surely what this event should be based on, if anything. And that&#8217;s <em>play<\/em>. So much of the time Craig and I are together it just feels like we&#8217;re playing.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"clear:both\">Two years on (oops, we missed our anniversary!), we&#8217;ve still never fought, because we just don&#8217;t want to. We&#8217;ve been there before in our lives, and it&#8217;s just no fun. So why would we, when we have a choice? I&#8217;d never want to do anything to hurt him.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p style=\"clear:both\">I&#8217;m not sure &#8220;play&#8221; that looks like in a ceremony &#8212; particularly a very small one (in numbers, though not in importance to me), but that&#8217;s my commitment now, to tie the reverential, out-of-the-everyday part of the occasion to a big balloon of play.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p>&lt;<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<p>p&gt;<br class=\"final-break\" style=\"clear:both\"><\/p>\n<\/p>\n<div class=\"blogger-post-footer\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"1\" height=\"1\" src=\"https:\/\/hame.ink\/blether\/wp-content\/uploads\/posts\/1201\/wedded-to-an-idea0.jpg.webp\" alt=\"\"><\/div><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>My darling is so patient: Tonight I experimented with a new recipe, a rice bowl with wasabi-dill dressing, snow peas, red pepper, avacado, chopped chives, and toasted pumpkin seeds. It sounds great. The reality was&#8230; crunchy. In a not-good way. He still said he liked it, and that&#8217;s why I love him. ~ Late this [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15492","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/hame.ink\/blether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15492","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/hame.ink\/blether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/hame.ink\/blether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hame.ink\/blether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hame.ink\/blether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15492"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/hame.ink\/blether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15492\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/hame.ink\/blether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15492"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hame.ink\/blether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15492"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/hame.ink\/blether\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15492"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}